The Source of HAPPINESS

There is a small stretch of about 14 Kilometers that I cover daily twice to reach my office from my present residence and the other way round. Although most of my colleagues and co-travelers in the vehicle during this time are half asleep owing to the early morning laziness and the evening tiredness but still I try my best to keep my eyes wide open and grasp as much of the exquisite phenomenon which all of us are so frantically trying to capture, a glimpse of ‘HAPPINESS’.

There are huts on both side of the miserably damaged road that we cover, in addition, population living there has their own set of typical issues like water logging during rainy season (which has an extended presence in this part of the world), a dearth of good school and colleges, cutoff from the amenities one can enjoy in the luxury of places like Delhi or Mumbai. To add to their woes the mighty Brahmaputra at the exhibition of its peak anger through a small tributary of its sweeps away or partially submerges the area, forcing the residents to rebuild their humble abode and start over and over again. Despite all this, a look into the populaces’ eyes and a simple examination of their faces reveal a sense of real happiness. So, the next set of questions which crosses your mind is--- how can they be so happy with all the miseries of this life?, Why despite having access to more resources in comparison to these ‘poor’ chaps, we are still not able to match their sense of self-gratification? And the biggest of them all is--- what is the source or drive behind this happiness?

Bit of thinking and observation pointed towards few of the following:

1.       The beautiful weather of this Place- might have made these people more pleasing, I am saying this applying the same logic as given for the extreme summer heats which are blamed for the soaring temperaments of the northern cities and a resultant increase in its crime rates.

2.      Penchant for music & festivals- North eastern Indian regions are known for the fondness they display for music and celebration, may be this is the reason that many of the festivals are celebrated more than once in this area with so much of fanfare. Consider the flagship festival of Assam called ‘Bihu’, it is celebrated four times a year and most of these revelries goes on for a fortnight to a month. May be the positivity they develop out of these kind of extended celebrations drags on for the whole year and make sure the inhabitants learns to unveil the same behavior of calmness and happiness even in the wake of extreme hardships.

3.      Slow pace of life- Another simple argument was to write this happiness off in the same manner as one dismisses the joy on the faces of children, knowing pretty well through experience that with an increasing maturity the happiness will be replaced by tension. Hence, one can say maybe because the area is underdeveloped as compared to the bigwigs so the city has not experienced the real pace of life, which when comes will obviously take away the sheen of its happy faces.

Sadly a further investigation into the above made me realize this cannot be the real source of happiness for these people. Weather in northeast India doesn’t show the same characteristics uniformly throughout the seven sister states, whereas, certain places like Shillong remains comfortably pleasing during the whole year, in certain regions like Assam the mood swings of weather are extreme, however the general trend of happiness remains the same. Similarly, the other two points can be discharged if one makes a deep enquiry into these trends. So, one can safely conclude the non-uniformity in certain physiognomies cannot account for the uniformity in behavior or mood. So the question remained unanswered what is the REAL SOURCE OF THIS HAPPINESS??

Sometimes when you don’t understand a phenomenon from one side then it is advisable to probe the other side to progress and therefore for the time being I left my fundamental pursuit. Instead, I tried enquiring- what happiness is? How do we get it? Or to put forth this simply--- when in recent times was I happy??

Starting off with what is ‘Happiness’ I moved to the widely acknowledged Oxford dictionary, it says ‘HAPPINESS’ is ‘state of being happy’, and further defines happy as ‘Feeling or showing pleasure or contentment’. Even the popular Wikipedia says something on the similar lines, it defines ‘Happiness’ as a ‘mental or emotional state of well-being defined by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy’. Most of the definitions I found revolved around this concept of ‘Pleasure’ and therefore one can safely assume that this is the keyword to happiness. Wait a minute, does this points to the fact that Happiness and pleasure are both correlated. For me this was confusing and hence to put this argument to test I went back and took out my moments of happiness and pleasure from the past.

There were two distinguished set of happy moments I could categories my past memorable positive feelings into-

(i)                 Happy Moments One- reminded me of events like when I brought my first car, when I got my first salary, when I got my higher education degree, when I brought my own house. Etc…

(ii)               Happy Moments two- pointed towards happenings on the lines of -when I went on the trips with my friends, when I challenged my limits and achieved something which I never thought of, when I again met my loved ones after some time of parting.. etc.

The commonality in ‘Happy Moments One’ is that the feeling was extreme in the beginning but when I go back and think about it now, it doesn’t give me the same kick or pleasure it once gave. For example when I got my first brand new car I used to look at it again and again without getting tired of admiring its beauty, it used to give me extreme sense of gratification and contentment, my heart beat used to increase even if a vehicle tried to get past from close, I could not afford any stranger touching it, the first scratch on it made my heart sank too deep, but years later now I am least bothered about its wellbeing, I don’t mind anyone touching it now or even taking it away from my eyes for days, the feeling of attachment has almost subsided.

Whereas, the shared feeling in ‘Happy Moments Two’ is that the intensity of those feelings have withstood the test of time. Thinking about the memories from the trip made to the northern part of India in extreme weather conditions still gives me same thrill and kick it gave me years earlier when the trip was made.  The thought of meeting my loved near and dear ones still gives me same amount of joy and happiness which I feel on every such meeting. All these feelings are long lasting and time independent.

And that is why I feel pleasure can never be the feeling attached to real happiness. Based on the common set of features I can easily bundle ‘Happy Moments One’ under the bracket of ‘Pleasure’ but cannot do the same for ‘Happy Moments Two’.

So, going back to my fundamental question of ‘What is the source of happiness’ I infer it is something which ‘gives one a LONG LASTING feeling of contentment and joy coming out of attachment to a non-materialistic thing, which hardly fades away with time’. And pleasure on contrary is something which gives one a feeling of extreme happiness at first but the joy certainly and exponentially declines with time, it is the feeling attached usually to materialistic things.

Now, going back to my fundamental question of ‘what is the source of Happiness’ of my subject, I conclude maybe the basic definition of Happiness has been misunderstood in its real sense, although we the educated, sophisticated, modern class failed to make a distinction between the thin line that separates pleasure and happiness which these so called class ‘C’ city people have been surprisingly able to make. Maybe our approach towards the source needs to divert into the other direction the right direction i.e. from materialistic to non-materialistic, from short term to the everlasting, from PLEASURE to HAPPINESS.

Although the search for me continues but I get a sense of feeling that may be I am on the right path now and pretty close to finding my source of happiness. Are you?? J

ढूँढ ना उसे तू जहा तहा,

शायद ज़ो तू चाहता है वो तो छुपा है यहा वाहा,

आँखें खोल और उसे तू जान,

अर्रे याहि तो पड़ा है उसे पहचान ||